So this is a quick post, but in the effort of accountability for my "phone plan" and to give an update I figured this is necessary.
It's been a week now and I have really done well. This weekend I slipping back into old habits of scrolling here and there but caught myself and was able to walk away from the phone. Who knew this would be such a challenge?? If you don't think you're that connected to your phone, try being super conscious of your phone use and find out!!
I will say, I LOVE not being on my phone during the day. Consistenly I find that my attitude is better, my patience with my kids increases, my involvement in their activities certainly increases, and I just feel like a better mom.
If you don't have kids then you might think the phone thing isn't a big deal (and maybe it isn't), but let me leave you with this thought. Are you missing out on other relationships by being distracted by social media? Maybe connecting more with your spouse instead of both mindlessly playing or scrollin on your phone at night? Are you missing out on connecting better with friends? Or maybe you're missing out on connecting with God who longs for a deeper relationship with us always?
I know all of those hit me on some level. All of those relationships mean so much more than getting caught up on everyone else's daily thoughs. On a side note, my hubby and I did download a game on our phones this week (which is so not me) but we compete together on our phones and hey, I'll take anything that'll give us another way to connect! So that's my phone exception ;)
So I have begun a new project called "BE PRESENT".
This is something that just came to me the other night as I was taking a shower (because don't all epiphanies happen during the shower when you finally get alone time?). I was reviewing my day and thinking about a blog post from a friend about how she traded in her iPhone for a flip phone. Yes, a flip phone!
So at first like most I was like...what?? Does anyone besides grandparents use flip phones? But the more I read, the more I understood. She admittedly talked about how her phone became such a distraction. It kept her from being present with her kids, it was the reason she found herself fussing at kids as they bothered her while she was mindlessly scrolling on social media, and it ultimately became an addiction.
I couldn't shake her post in the back of my mind and as I reviewed my day, I realized my phone was doing the same thing. In the effort to not ditch the iPhone, but knowing something needed to change, I started a plan. Really more, a list of phone rules for myself that I am committed to following.
Before I go into my plan, let me further explain why I personlly needed this. I realized I spend a rediculous amount of time mindlessly scrolling through Facebook, Instagram, and Snapchat all throughout my day. This may not be so bad except for the fact that I am a stay at home mom. This wasn't always the case either (the stay at home mom gig). I used to leave my daughter home with a sitter while I worked all day, but instead our family has made sacrified and I am blessed to be home with my two beautiful babies all day, every day. Yes, not everyday is super fun and not everyday do I see rainbows and butterflies feeling delighted to do laundry, dishes, clean up messes, change diapers, etc. BUT I am blessed to be the biggest influence in their young lives and experience their day to day WITH them.
The thing is...I wasn't really spending my days WITH them like I wanted. Yes I was physically there and sometimes present, but not fully present like I know I am called to be and like they need me to be. And I officially beacme fed up with that. I found myself irritated when I was scrolling and they needed juice or kept crawling on me, interrupting some article I was trying to read that someone reposted. It's not pretty and I'm not proud, so I decided NO MORE.
PUT THE PHONE DOWN!
When my kids are awake, the phone is down.
Exceptions are phone calls (which are rare and either with my parents or people I am helping with my Advocare business). Other exceptions, to reply to a quick text, which unless I initiate I realized I don't get many of.
If it's nap time and both are down (again rare) then I can pick it up and scroll or if it's late night.
After a day of this plan, I realized tonight as I began to scroll through today's updates I didn't miss it. I felt sooooooo free! The minute I began to scroll I felt a little suffocated.
So to reflect on day 1, it was a great day. After churc and before a family eveing BBQ I played with my kids, really played. I was there, fully and soaking in their laughs, silliness, and just them as little people. My baby napped while I played with my 3 year old, doing ABCmouse, coloring, and just enjoying her.
I was a kinder momma, a more patient momma, and it felt amazing.
I will do more of this and will continue to follow this plan. I need it, and my family needs it. I am going to LOVE this new normal.